How are you feeling about going back to school?

This experience will have been different for every student, teacher and parent. Some will be happy, others traumatised and everything in between. We can’t assume how anyone feels. How do we deal with all of this?

Phychologist Dr Helen Street, chair of Positive Schools, suggests we ask 4 questions similar to these. Make sure EVERY person has a chance to answer each one in their own way- speaking, drawing, one to one or in the group. They must feel they belong and have an equal voice : 1. What felt different for you learning at home? 2. What did you enjoy? 3. What did you miss? 4. What would you like to do differently back at school?

It’s very healthy to TALK about and experience your FEELINGS. Use Circle Time, so everyone has a chance to speak. ALL feelings are good, it’s what we do with them that can make a difference. If we let them CONTROL us, that’s where we can be in trouble! YOU need to CONTROL your feelings so you don’t hurt either yourself or others, and so you can feel happier. We need to all build strategies to control our feelings. (See some helpful posters below)

Controlling your feelings by SELF SOOTHING

What helps YOU clam down? Everyone is different. Modeling Self Soothing gives the best example that it works, do some together: e.g. Deep breathing, drinking water, reading, walking, running, playing outside, painting, cooking, eating (not too much!!), listening to music, singing, dancing, playing sport, watching a movie, mediation, mindfulness, games, jokes, laughing, lying down, resting, sunshine, swimming, a bath, the gym, exercises, yoga, writing, drawing, puzzles, jigsaws, climbing, sitting under or in a tree, the park, a playground, talking to a friend or helper, pets, animals, fishing, lego, IT, robotics, etc.

Mindfulness or Meditation

Always helps to ground and centre us, and has much research to show it works. There are many resources such as Smiling Mind, that can be used.

Routine

PREDICTION = SAFETY Have a schedule up each day so there are no surprises, and if the schedule changes, let the students know in advance if possible. After all the disruptions, routine is comfort.

Gratitude

There are ALWAYS things to be grateful for. Focusing on the things that go right can help to increase mood. Do this in a written, spoken, in your mind or pictorial way. Try and do it every day until the next holidays to get them into the habit. Have a gratitude board in the staff room, tell students to ask their parents what they are grateful for.

Discover Strengths

Use strength cards and discussions, or questionnaires, to discover each others strengths – both physical and emotional. Talk about how you could use your strengths to help others. Make Strength posters, display them. We ALL have strengths we can share to make the world a better place.

Exercise every day

Get the students and yourself moving, both in the classroom, or work area and outside. Dance, sing, do brain gym, PE, a ‘Play is the Way’ game, Simon says, etc. have frequent breaks if students are not settled.

Relationship and Empathy

Get to know your students all over again, things will have changed. Some will have improved, some will have regressed – in either learning and /or behaviour. Relationship is VERY important, every person wants to belong, this goes for staff as well. Empathy is relationship building.

Posters that may help:

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Transition can be complex. Last year there were orientation days, ordering books and uniforms, planning, setting classes, pictures taken etc. Teachers will have made resources, planned, set up the room and displays, but most importantly they will have become aware of all the students in their class, average, smart, special needs- at both ends of the spectrum and will have learnt a little about each child.

Now shoes can be bought, maybe a count down is on, or calendar, getting into bedtime routine after holidays. Talk about any fears or feelings, being careful not to put YOUR anxieties onto your child. Have a  classmate to play, (new or old), have uniforms and bag ready and named- nothing more frustrating than loosing new jumpers, jackets, lunch boxes, hats, etc so NAME everything that they may take off or misplace, even initial inside their shoes, name any books, pencils lunch bags etc. Listen to their dreams– what are they looking forward to, things that they may be apprehensive about,  answering questions as best as possible, reading books about going to school, especially if it is their first year.

If beginning Secondary School, make sure they know how they will be getting to and from school, with routes and bus / train / riding / walking times worked out. Some students benefit from colour coding their books for each subject so they are easier to find.

Check that they haven’t out grown their uniforms and shoes NOW if not just starting out- kids grow during the holidays!!! You may have to take pants, dresses down, or buy new ones!

Talk about ‘self soothing’– things to do to calm down if they are overwhelmed or over excited. Deep breathing, counting, finding a quiet place, drinking water, reading, fidget toys, stress ball, drawing, walking etc. Practise them at home as well. Special needs students may need to work out a place to go and a visual clue with their teacher. Be aware of the signs your body gives you – heart beat, sweating, dry throat, tears etc so you know you need to calm down.

Parents– don’t hang around too long with beginners, even if they are upset, they usually calm very quickly after you have left. The longer you stay the harder it is for all. I have heard one child ask, ‘Has she gone yet?’ and stopped crying immediately!! Sometimes they think it’s what YOU want!! Others have FOMO- fear of missing out- they are imagining everything you are doing at home with other siblings or at work- reassure them they will have time after school- maybe a story, or a cuddle might do the trick!

Good luck to all teachers, students and parents on the exciting year ahead. You can do it! 

Self Talk Changes your MIND and your ACTIONS

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